Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now The Islands.
Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Chuck Norris can kill 100 percent of whatever the fuck he wants.
Some kids piss their name in the snow. Chuck Norris can piss his name into concrete.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
Chuck Norris' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd; no one fools Chuck Norris.